A Date with Mr Successful

Mr Successful

by Winson Lee

In this article, I just feel compelled to write about a successful male’s priority list. Also, think of this list as traits our society view that a modern man should have. This list may not apply to some of you out there, but I believe it certainly applies to many of us guys out there, including myself. These few weeks have been really difficult as I do some soul searching and thinking about my priorities in life. In this materialistic world we are living in, it is not uncommon for most of us to equate Mr. Successful with the traits that I am going to list down soon. I might use guys, men or man interchangeably but I generally mean the same thing, Adam’s descendants.

Disclaimer:

Winson Lee shall not be held responsible for any discomfort or discontentment resulting from this list. As good (or as crude) as the list may sound, please bear in mind that I am not advocating these values as I truly believe Mr. Successful should be someone who is able to provide, bless the people around him, and think rationally what his true priorities are while knowing why in the world God placed him on Bumi (‘Earth’ in Malay).

1) Money

Also known as cash and $$$. For Mr. Successful, this is his instrument or tool. Without money, it is absolutely impossible to attain the others below in the list. This is Mr. Successful’s main priority because after attaining loads of money, he can exchange it for other items that he deems necessary.

Explanation: A man’s security lies first in money. Without money, guys believe they cannot be successful because everything around them revolves about money. Money for house, money for car, money for retirement, money for entertainment, money for investment, money for parents, money… and the list goes on. Ponder about how a guy feels when he is out of money. All guys generally want to achieve financial freedom as it helps them to get the best out of life.

2) Career

Career has an evil twin brother, namely Day Job. Both of them do not really agree with each other often but there is one thing they certainly agree on – Mr. Successful needs both of them to be successful. Career and Day Job also agree that they are related to Money, their long-lost rich uncle.

Explanation: After money, career comes next for a man. In fact, I believe career and money are inseparable. Still, money comes first. A career differs from a day job simply because a career is something long-term while a day job is (well quite self-explanatory) what you do as a job from 9 to 5. Nevertheless, a man needs both of them to earn money. When a man is unemployed, he has a low self esteem because he is jobless and worse, moneyless. To be successful is to be in a high paying position in a reputable company.

3) Girls or women

Having both money and career, Mr. Successful wants to have pretty looking women around him. He believes money plays a factor in a relationship and he holds the upper hand since he has money and career. He does not mind flirting since he is in demand.

Explanation: As offensive as it may sounds, guys may at times see the opposite gender as objects or trophies. I know that guys are visually-stimulated but sometimes we desire or go after pretty-looking girls just for the sake that they are pretty! Worse still, some of us out there believe that money is everything in securing a girlfriend or a wife. While I agree that a fraction of women these days do look at money, I disagree that money can secure you a decent wife. Absolutely disagree that to be successful you must have a pretty girlfriend or wife. (If you have a pretty one, do thank God please.)

4) Social life

Mr. Successful needs to have a great deal of friends for his social life aka networking. No social life means staying at home during weekends or do not go clubbing-a sign of failure.

Explanation: Heard of the Gentlemen Club before? This is the club where all men join the club just for the sake of networking and expanding their web of contacts. Guess what, you need all the above before reaching this stage. Sometimes, no one really cares if anyone embraces true friendship, what really matters is what benefits he has for me. A guy/man who do not go clubbing is labelled as anti-social or mummy’s boy. That does not sound really successful, no?

5) Education

Mr. Successful needs to be educated in order to be successful. A degree in anything will do. A Masters would be better. PhD is best (anyone knows the hair joke?). Superb if you get admitted into any of the Ivy League universities, who cares if there are people more worthy than you, as long as I am one of the crème de la crème or the chosen ones.

Explanation: Education is important. I am not saying that you don’t need to study. What I am saying is, sometimes guys get so obsessed about getting a PhD (anyone knows the hair joke?) just to impress others and tell others how successful they are.

6) Face

Mr Successful needs to have face. To have face is to have all the above. Face is a more crude term than image. But, basically they both mean the same thing.

Explanation: Seriously, do you need me to explain this?

(Ladies, you always have the option not to date him…. Gents, you always have the option to prove my evil Winson wrong. =P )

In The Face of Disability

In this second post (Introduction was my first), I would like to start on a high note. As I sat and thought about what to write, I vow to ensure all my blog posts are of substance and not mere “emo” posts like the other blogs out there. No offense to those bloggers who believe that blogs are good avenues to vent your emotions. It’s just not my style, unfortunately. So here we go:

Today, someone by the name of Mr Victor Chin, who is an artist, photographer, and curator, gave a talk in my college about the disabled community. He mentioned about how this segment of community – often neglected by the rest – have struggled to live normal lives as citizens in Malaysia. He also talked about his involvement with these disabled people.

I would like to invite all of us to reflect about ourselves.

How many times have we complained about the late (euphemism = a bit not-punctual) ‘Rapid KL’ buses?

Rapid KL is one of Kuala Lumpur’s major bus companies who strives to offer good transportation services to the public. Pun intended.

How many times have we envied those who have what we do not have? I used to envy my sprinter friends who are gifted with long and super fast legs. Oh God, why can’t I run as fast them?

Or perhaps, in our exam-oriented Malaysian society, why can’t I get that string of As that everyone seems to score?

I can go on and on, but allow me to state this: We – often drowned in our perceived lack in studies, work, career, and our own bodies in this materialistic world- are so blessed with gifts that disabled people long for, and for certain reasons, do not realize how blessed we are.

This is typical: I AM NOT SMART ENOUGH TO SCORE 10 A1s IN PUBLIC EXAMINATION. (My evil Winson would really like to scream out “So what?”, but that is a bit too crude and “unprocessed”). But yeah, so what?

Have we thought of children born with learning disabilities i.e autism, Down Syndrome that would hinder them from even obtaining basic education in our public schools? It seems that parents with these special children, more often than not, have to send their kids to special schools just to learn basic skills such as counting, writing, and reading.

In such circumstances, would 10 A1s in their SPM certificate really make that much of a difference? I doubt. (SPM is Malaysia’s equivalent of O-Level qualification. Students are pretty much obsessed with ‘A’ in this part of the world). This I-am-not-good-enough syndrome is universal although the example used is quite specific. We always look for what we do not have rather than what we have.

These disabled children long to acquire basic education just enough to prepare them to face this world, which more often than not in their pursuit for globalization unknowingly marginalize this segment of society, at least in Malaysia. Maybe I tend to generalize too much, but let me say that Malaysia, our beloved nation, is just not very friendly to the disabled community.

HOW UNFRIENDLY MALAYSIA CAN BE?

1) Our public transportation are not catered to these people. One of my lecturers was sharing how he was shocked to see a telecommunication tower erected in the path of those Braille guide on a Bukit Bintang pathway (those yellow thick blocks that I once thought were for decorative purposes).

2) No jobs for them. If you, as an employer for a multi-national conglomerate, have a choice to employ either a fully-able person or a wheelchair-bound person, who would you pick?

3) No mobility + no job = no money. It is hardly a surprise to realize that the disabled community in Malaysia is largely still dependent on others to take care of them. Some of them are successful, they are our brilliant examples of perseverance and determination; but most are still imprisoned in their homes.

The disabled community seeks to live independently. Source: http://victorchin.com/blog/

These are just some perspective that I would like to share. I always believe that there are exceptions but I strongly believe the disabled community deserve more attention to help them lead ordinary lives, independent lives, dignified lives.

Some of my claims may sound offensive ( I am sorry about that) but, do think of how much more the disabled community are offended for being discriminated, and unheard of, in their very own land.

*The title “In The Face of Disability” is borrowed from Victor Chin’s exhibition. For more information on the disabled community in Malaysia, please go to http://victorchin.com/blog/

Introduction

Hello everyone.

It’s nice to be back after a long hiatus. I had a blog once but it was practically dead.

Old blog Status = deceased.

I hope this new blog would be an interesting one, reflecting my thoughts and ideals. Otherwise, just a platform to leap on something exciting. I pray this one will not suffer similar consequence as my previous blog.

Somewhat, I can attribute this setting up of new blog to peer pressure because somehow everyone blogs, and Winson does not.

“Eh, Winson, what’s your blog link wei? ”

“I dun have one.”

That happens to me almost every time I meet someone new.

Anyway, I will cut short my introduction because an introduction should remain an introduction. I ll share my other thoughts, or metaphorically known as “leaps” in this blog, in blogs to come. Do check it out soon. I am leaping to church now because service starts at 5.30pm. =P Bye.

Have a nice day.

New blog Status = Online.